It is sweet and comforting like hot chocolate to think of yourself as a courageous heart. And although I'm nearly 24, I think it is still quite young and innocent and beautiful. This past week has been a blessing and so I will share its story:
Ancient Greece in the Hospital
I had my second official clinical encounter this week, this time in the ER. It was night and my fellow PA colleagues and I did a bout of waiting before making it down to visit with a patient with a retropharyngeal abscess. Of course we asked and heard plenty of his sick-tale -his illness narrative -traveling from clinic to hospital to hospital, coughing up old blood, the pain, the pus, the infection, the uncertainty, and the really good doctor. But his life story was what was so absolutely fascinating. He was a retired engineer who now whiled away his days in a magical world of sculpting with metal and painting -a passionate artist. He had immigrated to Canada from Greece after the Second World War and he and his wife were married here almost immediately upon landing. He is a lover of Ancient Greek Mythology and Philosophy, his two children and many grandchildren, and the sands, waters and mountains of his birth-country. He loves telling his story -a story of pride, hard work, love, passion. He is outspoken when it comes to politics, immigration concerns (this was actually rather unnerving to hear about, frankly -but I guess seeming-discrimination perhaps is just one of his flaws, and we've all got flaws, lots of flaws... it's out of ignorance and fear of what you don't know and he lived in a completely different era in Europe -it was not malicious or ill-meaning... I don't even think he realized it, really. Here's the thing, he has a good heart. We can only do the best we can right.) and religion -he worships only the Great Philosophers of Ancient Greece it seems.
Bearers of Warmth and Service
Outreach with Project Genesis was really amazing. We froze our bums off walking down to some very poorly kept apartment buildings with awful landlords and tenants who really suffer for it. Like it's winter right, so it's normal that it's cold... outside. Not inside though. It's actually against the law in this province for there to be inadequate heating in apartment buildings (and this is the responsibility of the landlord). But these tenants -mostly immigrants from South Asia, Africa, Haiti -they deal with inadequate heating, no hot water and mouse infestations. In the dead of winter. In Montreal. And the landlord does nothing about it. And the buildings themselves are falling apart.
And if affects their health and their well-being, and their children and so much. Take for example the man who recently had heart surgery. He can't shower because the water goes hot-cold too fast, too often. So he has to fill up buckets of water in order to bathe. As if we live in some under-developed country. It's a pretty shitty deal.
So we go and give them information -phone numbers, addresses, let them know what their rights are, that they can contest rent increases and report landlord abuses. And it feels good to make a very tiny difference. It feels good that after walking the 4 floors of the building, knocking on each door, helping a bunch of them call the inspectors to report the urgency of substandard heating, that at the end of it, the inspectors finally agreed to come and try to fix the problem directly. Like if I would have died at the end of that day, I helped my fellow woman and man in my very small way. Even though the laws were made by landlords and are therefore skewed to protect landlords and not tenants -a problematic, systemic flaw bound to have been abused historically and presently.
New Cafes, Old Friends
It was wonderful to meet up with old friends from home (here) and old friend from 'fair Harvard'. And to try a new bistro that is very 'Montreal'. And to catch up about the existential wonder that was the undergrad I took for granted. The philosophizing, the interesting discussion and intellectual stimuation -essentially, the stereotype we often denied. I mean, we didn't live the stereotype everyday, but it was certainly accessible at will, and now, not so much. Professional school just doesn't have that 'let's think about life and the world and talk about everything' kind of philsophy that underpins the liberal arts education that is the real education of life, really. It was lovely. Also, I had no idea about these 'secret societies' of top-notch Harvard professors so those were fun stories.
Adversity When It Was Going So Good
So I had all this -life was really charming, it was like Turkish baklava. Sweet, rich, satisfying. I even hosted my first Osler Society lecture for the Lecture Series we organize -it was with a historian of surgery and it was interesting, and we had good turn-out. I had been swimming 2 km twice a week for the last couple of weeks. I was even enjoying a little crush. And then it happens. The Universe throws you a curve ball. It was of a med-school related nature -nothing I won't be able to catch, even if only after it hit the ground a couple times. But still, it throws you off. But I'm almost 24 now -really, a big girl. A young woman in all of her prime and wonder. So it's going to be okay. I am happy and I feel loved.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Med World "The Reckoning": Of Frustration, Guts and Premies.
Oh how ironic. Shortly after experiencing that high of love and joy, life decided to dish up a nice quart of hate. It has been a long time since I've actually felt that much passionate outrage, but really, suffice to say that there are some really horrible people in my med school class. Like you wonder how they made it through the selection sieve. Gossping, snickering, giggling, swearing... in front of patients, about their peers, etc. Seriously disgusting folk. I would not wish that kind of doctor on my worst enemy (well, okay, I'm only human, so maybe I would wish it on my worst enemy, but right now I don't even have a nemesis... except maybe these guys themselves... and I guess I still wouldn't wish it on them -imagine being sick and then dealing with docs with attitude and a mean streak -how awful!).
Otherwise, I am studying for my GI midterm which is in two days (this is a study break). I've done embryology, anatomy, biochem and half of histo... so just physiology and the other half of histo left. But that's just the first pass, and I always try to do two passes before an exam. So CRUNCH indeed!
A couple days ago I actually got to watch a colonoscopy and a gastroscopy (the rude crew was present and actually got told off by the attending -how embarassing for all of us there -but enough about them) -it was so cool! The poor guy having the colonoscopy had quite a few polyps in his large intestine, but apparently they were relatively small and so less likely to be malignant. The gastrointerologists removed most of them by biopsy, but one was large enough to require cauterization which was like lassoing the white lump of tissue with a wire and then running an electic current through it, essentially burning it off.
'Guess I was pretty lucky to see that -it's unfortunate that medically 'cool' procedures mean that the patients present more pathology. I really feel a whole ethical/moral thing about all of it, because you can't help feeling a rush of fascination and wonder. Like how dare I feel this in the wake of another human being's anxiety or pain (this patient was not in pain though, they were consciously sedated, and we actually can't really feel sharp pain in the colon the way you might closer to your skin). Although I suppose part of that rush has to do with also seeing how 'fixable' some of these things can be... at least to a certain extent. So far, after the heart, I think the GI tract is the next coolest organ.
I may have forgotten to mention that in early January, I actually did some shadowing in Neonatology at the Royal Vic. Premies (hospital-talk for 'premature babies') are really something else. Like really so helpless and so vulnerable, and you can't help feeling that over-brimming love towards them. But it's scary as hell too. I mean imagine, if you screw up, and that literal thing that looks like a doll, scrunches up it's face for the last time... the parents that have to bury their baby, never watching it grow, explore, learn and fall in love with the world. And the thing is, the premies already have names. First names. The docs and the nurses use the last names when they do rounds and all of that, which is really smart I think in terms of managing potential trauma. But when you see a new mother walk in and put her hands inside the phototherapy incubator and caress the tiny little pink fingers, cooing "Eva, sweetheart"... yeah, just imagine. Maybe that's why you never see the neonatologists smiling. I don't know, something about all that was disconcerting.
Okay, back to the books -this writing break was longer than I would have liked! Here's the soundtrack of my life/studying these days, Brandy's "Right Here (Departed)". I like to call it the "One Sweet Day" of the 2000's:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdqwbJxMRWU
Yes, I am obsessed. But at least it's obsess-worthy.
Otherwise, I am studying for my GI midterm which is in two days (this is a study break). I've done embryology, anatomy, biochem and half of histo... so just physiology and the other half of histo left. But that's just the first pass, and I always try to do two passes before an exam. So CRUNCH indeed!
A couple days ago I actually got to watch a colonoscopy and a gastroscopy (the rude crew was present and actually got told off by the attending -how embarassing for all of us there -but enough about them) -it was so cool! The poor guy having the colonoscopy had quite a few polyps in his large intestine, but apparently they were relatively small and so less likely to be malignant. The gastrointerologists removed most of them by biopsy, but one was large enough to require cauterization which was like lassoing the white lump of tissue with a wire and then running an electic current through it, essentially burning it off.
'Guess I was pretty lucky to see that -it's unfortunate that medically 'cool' procedures mean that the patients present more pathology. I really feel a whole ethical/moral thing about all of it, because you can't help feeling a rush of fascination and wonder. Like how dare I feel this in the wake of another human being's anxiety or pain (this patient was not in pain though, they were consciously sedated, and we actually can't really feel sharp pain in the colon the way you might closer to your skin). Although I suppose part of that rush has to do with also seeing how 'fixable' some of these things can be... at least to a certain extent. So far, after the heart, I think the GI tract is the next coolest organ.
I may have forgotten to mention that in early January, I actually did some shadowing in Neonatology at the Royal Vic. Premies (hospital-talk for 'premature babies') are really something else. Like really so helpless and so vulnerable, and you can't help feeling that over-brimming love towards them. But it's scary as hell too. I mean imagine, if you screw up, and that literal thing that looks like a doll, scrunches up it's face for the last time... the parents that have to bury their baby, never watching it grow, explore, learn and fall in love with the world. And the thing is, the premies already have names. First names. The docs and the nurses use the last names when they do rounds and all of that, which is really smart I think in terms of managing potential trauma. But when you see a new mother walk in and put her hands inside the phototherapy incubator and caress the tiny little pink fingers, cooing "Eva, sweetheart"... yeah, just imagine. Maybe that's why you never see the neonatologists smiling. I don't know, something about all that was disconcerting.
Okay, back to the books -this writing break was longer than I would have liked! Here's the soundtrack of my life/studying these days, Brandy's "Right Here (Departed)". I like to call it the "One Sweet Day" of the 2000's:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Yes, I am obsessed. But at least it's obsess-worthy.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Over-Brimming Love. And Other Delicious Tales.
I'm talking about the surest way into your friends' deepest, most cherished part of their hearts (through their aortic valve if you will ;) -hosting a lovely laid-back dinner party. And none of that pot-luck business. I mean, the pot-luck thing is cool and can certainly be done much more frequently, but one really ought to do it properly at least once a year (or more, if one is not a med student or any other kind of student / professional who studies / works more than a 40 hour week).
I know. Where have I been right. This update is so overdue. Anyway, here I am. The sex unit is long gone, as are the glorious winter holidays, and I am now in the midst of our GI / Endocrinology unit. It's all fine. I believe since today and my last post I have felt numerous urges to write, but once it passes by, the moment's gone and I can't even remember what those moments were, except that the early days of January -those Monday-of-the-year blues -really had me generally disenchanted. But things are looking up. They better anyway right -I'm almost 24 and at the peak of my prime...
This weekend I hosted my very first dinner party for 9 med-school friends. It went really well. Under the supervision and guidance of my mother I cooked up the following:
1. Hors D'Oeuvres: my specialty Mexican salad (chopped de-seeded tomatoes, green peppers and red onion, kidney beans, tex mex cheese, zesty Italian salad dressing and corn chips -you gotta add these in last otherwise they get soggy and that's no fun!), and olive-sundried tomato tapenade shrimp vol-au-vents. that's right. yummy.
2. Plats Principals: East-African Indian-style chicken biryani, saffron basmati rice, and spinach curry.
3. Desserts: Mango moose topped with strawberries, fresh mango, blueberries, kiwi, with little chocolate waffers and pomegranate on the side, and little swiss chocolates from France.
4. Breuvages: Homemade non-alcoholic punch (orange juice, grapefruit juice, lemonade, gingerale, marachino cheeries and mint flakes), and real chai (like in the big pot -so not hard by the way -for tea for 10 all you have to do is put 4 cups of milk and 6 cups of water in a pot, add saffron, whole cardamom, a couple of cinnamon sticks and a tsp or so of crushed cardamom, bring it all to a boil on low heat, then add in about 4 tea bags and once that's boiling / the right colour, it's all ready to serve!).
It was a huge success. Also there is probably no high on earth (that I have yet experienced... there probably will be a better high once, uh, ahem, that special someone comes along... ;) like the high of cooking for and feeding the people you love. Like 3 hours after everyone had left I was still totally wired (I had been up early, cooked all morning and part of the afternoon, then spent the rest of the day 'setting up' and I had cleaned the whole house top to bottom the night before, so maybe this was an exhausted second-wind -this is a possibility too I suppose, but I felt such overwhelming, over-brimming love afterwards, that I feel this is the secret non-altruistic side of generosity =).
Anyway, back to real life and real studying now for my midterm next Monday -and this week's lookin' pretty hectic with various sorts of commitments. Also, I have a little internal drama going on, but I refuse to post this on my blog. And by internal, I literally mean 'in my head' so don't get too excited. The goal is to keep it there, let the fire burn out and then move right along with normal, focused, undistracted life. I'm not denying or suppressing it -we know that always backfires. But you know, trying to stay cool and calm. I am whole and happy and really, one ought to be satisfied with the over-brimming love of friendship for now methinks.
I know. Where have I been right. This update is so overdue. Anyway, here I am. The sex unit is long gone, as are the glorious winter holidays, and I am now in the midst of our GI / Endocrinology unit. It's all fine. I believe since today and my last post I have felt numerous urges to write, but once it passes by, the moment's gone and I can't even remember what those moments were, except that the early days of January -those Monday-of-the-year blues -really had me generally disenchanted. But things are looking up. They better anyway right -I'm almost 24 and at the peak of my prime...
This weekend I hosted my very first dinner party for 9 med-school friends. It went really well. Under the supervision and guidance of my mother I cooked up the following:
1. Hors D'Oeuvres: my specialty Mexican salad (chopped de-seeded tomatoes, green peppers and red onion, kidney beans, tex mex cheese, zesty Italian salad dressing and corn chips -you gotta add these in last otherwise they get soggy and that's no fun!), and olive-sundried tomato tapenade shrimp vol-au-vents. that's right. yummy.
2. Plats Principals: East-African Indian-style chicken biryani, saffron basmati rice, and spinach curry.
3. Desserts: Mango moose topped with strawberries, fresh mango, blueberries, kiwi, with little chocolate waffers and pomegranate on the side, and little swiss chocolates from France.
4. Breuvages: Homemade non-alcoholic punch (orange juice, grapefruit juice, lemonade, gingerale, marachino cheeries and mint flakes), and real chai (like in the big pot -so not hard by the way -for tea for 10 all you have to do is put 4 cups of milk and 6 cups of water in a pot, add saffron, whole cardamom, a couple of cinnamon sticks and a tsp or so of crushed cardamom, bring it all to a boil on low heat, then add in about 4 tea bags and once that's boiling / the right colour, it's all ready to serve!).
It was a huge success. Also there is probably no high on earth (that I have yet experienced... there probably will be a better high once, uh, ahem, that special someone comes along... ;) like the high of cooking for and feeding the people you love. Like 3 hours after everyone had left I was still totally wired (I had been up early, cooked all morning and part of the afternoon, then spent the rest of the day 'setting up' and I had cleaned the whole house top to bottom the night before, so maybe this was an exhausted second-wind -this is a possibility too I suppose, but I felt such overwhelming, over-brimming love afterwards, that I feel this is the secret non-altruistic side of generosity =).
Anyway, back to real life and real studying now for my midterm next Monday -and this week's lookin' pretty hectic with various sorts of commitments. Also, I have a little internal drama going on, but I refuse to post this on my blog. And by internal, I literally mean 'in my head' so don't get too excited. The goal is to keep it there, let the fire burn out and then move right along with normal, focused, undistracted life. I'm not denying or suppressing it -we know that always backfires. But you know, trying to stay cool and calm. I am whole and happy and really, one ought to be satisfied with the over-brimming love of friendship for now methinks.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Nostalgia, Fatigue, Stream of Consciousness.
It has grown cold and windy. Sometimes there's ice, sometimes there's snow, but more often, rain of late. Makes me miss Cambridge like crazy. Also I spent an hour on YouTube yesterday watching clips of Harvard a capella (mostly the Veritones, not gonna lie). These two are my faves (unfortunately stellar Kuumba hits were not to be found... at least not by me!):
Veritones: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHPsoV06QIY&feature=related
Din & Tonics: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgY8Y1owNt8&feature=related
The sun rises when I'm already on the bus on the way to school and feels like it sets shortly after lunch (it probably sets around 4:00 in real life). I have been craving sushi a lot lately. And chocolate, poutine and romance. I guess the last one is probably normal around this 'holiday' time of the year combined with the fact that our current unit is "The Life Cycle" -yes, it is the sex unit. Shout out to P. Ellison for teaching some mad solid reproductive endocrinology in evolutionary biology (bio anthro) a couple years ago -it is serving me well here.
But actually, I guess I am tired at last about talking about med school. Life outside of med school feels like, I don't know, coconuts growing on pine trees in the dead of winter, in Quebec. Rare. And wonderful. I'm sure I'll want to talk about it again at some point in the not-so-far-away future, but not now. I am tired now -my absolute refractory period for studying after taking an exam seems to have lengthened. I want to sleep a lot, I don't like waking up, but I love eating. I recently saw the new Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman (sexiest man alive indeed!) movie "Australia" -highly enjoyable. I am a "co-overseer" (read: co-pres) for the McGill Osler Society, "dedicated to raising awareness of the medical humanities", specifically responsible for finances (thank you WorldMUN for stamping me permanently with a "she is a legit money guarder" sign in all subsequent extra-curricular involvement ;), and helping organize the weekly lecture series.
I am going swimming later this evening and look forward to reuniting with a much missed "killer 8". This is Take 2. Take 1 was unsuccessful in setting up any kind of routine when I subsequently fell quite ill. But Take 2's a winner -I can feel it.
I need a haircut. I miss my sister very much -can't wait till she comes home. I want to read for pleasure. And I would like to spend a day watching movies with a common "theme" -like all Meg Ryan, or made in 1993, or nominated-but-did-not-win an Oscar, or starts with the letter "G", or has the word "after" in the title. I also would like to cook a very elaborate meal. Like a seven-course dinner or something for some people I love, and then play 'Taboo' or 'Pictionary' and have someone else make the same "When Harry Met Sally" reference that I would be thinking about and yell out "Baby- Fishmouth!" and then we would toss our hair and eat some shrimp and olives, and laugh so intensely it would be mute laughter.
Well that's a nice thought. But for now, back to catching up on that lecture I skipped yesterday morning in the name of sleep and sanity.
Veritones: http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Din & Tonics: http://www.youtube.com/watch?
The sun rises when I'm already on the bus on the way to school and feels like it sets shortly after lunch (it probably sets around 4:00 in real life). I have been craving sushi a lot lately. And chocolate, poutine and romance. I guess the last one is probably normal around this 'holiday' time of the year combined with the fact that our current unit is "The Life Cycle" -yes, it is the sex unit. Shout out to P. Ellison for teaching some mad solid reproductive endocrinology in evolutionary biology (bio anthro) a couple years ago -it is serving me well here.
But actually, I guess I am tired at last about talking about med school. Life outside of med school feels like, I don't know, coconuts growing on pine trees in the dead of winter, in Quebec. Rare. And wonderful. I'm sure I'll want to talk about it again at some point in the not-so-far-away future, but not now. I am tired now -my absolute refractory period for studying after taking an exam seems to have lengthened. I want to sleep a lot, I don't like waking up, but I love eating. I recently saw the new Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman (sexiest man alive indeed!) movie "Australia" -highly enjoyable. I am a "co-overseer" (read: co-pres) for the McGill Osler Society, "dedicated to raising awareness of the medical humanities", specifically responsible for finances (thank you WorldMUN for stamping me permanently with a "she is a legit money guarder" sign in all subsequent extra-curricular involvement ;), and helping organize the weekly lecture series.
I am going swimming later this evening and look forward to reuniting with a much missed "killer 8". This is Take 2. Take 1 was unsuccessful in setting up any kind of routine when I subsequently fell quite ill. But Take 2's a winner -I can feel it.
I need a haircut. I miss my sister very much -can't wait till she comes home. I want to read for pleasure. And I would like to spend a day watching movies with a common "theme" -like all Meg Ryan, or made in 1993, or nominated-but-did-not-win an Oscar, or starts with the letter "G", or has the word "after" in the title. I also would like to cook a very elaborate meal. Like a seven-course dinner or something for some people I love, and then play 'Taboo' or 'Pictionary' and have someone else make the same "When Harry Met Sally" reference that I would be thinking about and yell out "Baby- Fishmouth!" and then we would toss our hair and eat some shrimp and olives, and laugh so intensely it would be mute laughter.
Well that's a nice thought. But for now, back to catching up on that lecture I skipped yesterday morning in the name of sleep and sanity.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Medtertainment in the Midst of Studying...
I have a renal-resp-cardio final exam in 2 days. So no, this is not a real post. I will post 'for real' sometime next week -there will be plenty to talk about! For now though, a glimpse at some quality 'medtertainment' of late... even if you have not been to/never will go to medical school, they are enjoyable. Some good witty fun.
Cardio is Sexy: http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=GVxJJ2DBPiQ
Breathing is Dreamy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kP2OuZ_vI_s&feature=related
Kidney Stone Dance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFfPWerPvBs&feature=related
Back to the books...
Cardio is Sexy: http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=
Breathing is Dreamy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kP2OuZ_vI_s&feature=related
Kidney Stone Dance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Back to the books...
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Changing World. And Yesterday's Thoughts on It.
When I say yesterday, I am not trying to poetically refer to the past or history. I mean, yesterday quite literally. There was an urge to write, so I did it on a piece of paper with a pencil at Starbucks.
Just before I relay that entry, I wanted to tell you that today, as a volunteer with Project Genesis (which I have discussed in previous entries), I accompanied the woman I work with to interview a nurse who works for Medecins du Monde for a mini-documentary she's doing on healthcare rights, etc. This nurse, through MM, which also has psychologists, a couple of volunteer doctors and probably some social workers, actually goes on the streets of Montreal with a small suitcase on wheels and a backpack, to deliver basic care (vaccines, UTI medicine, etc) out of a little 'clinic' to communities that have been marginalized by the healthcare system -mainly people who live on the street / street workers, prostitutes, and Natives/First Nations people. Really, it was amazing to hear about her story and heartening that there are actually so many people like her and so many organizations like this one in Montreal, that don't even exist in other parts of Canada. This is why I am proud to be a Montrealer.
Anyway, this was what I had to say yesterday (my thoughts on Obama's glorious win, and on delicious food).
Caramel apple cider is delicious. I don't think many people know about it or realize how wonderful it is, but really... apple pie in a cup. Life is good today, the world is sweet. Yes, I'm going on four hours of sleep, renal is kicking my ass so far and I don't feel like studying, but it's a beautiful, warm, sunny day in November. And last night Obama made history -first elected African-American President of the United States of America. The media at least keeps framing it this race-way. But it is really so much more than that, like charcoal-grey, thick, cottony clouds blowing away, out of the way, and beneath, the glow of a vibrant world with hope renewed all around. He is a man with a vision of peace, justice, alliances and prosperity for his people; he has spirit and his charisma is infused in every poetic world uttered, words that will move more than hearts, and, inshallah, will summon more than tears from the people's eyes -joy, hope and real, profound change. Not overnight of course, and not without many a grueling challenge, but slow, gradual positive transformation. It is amazing.
I have been wishing everyone 'Happy Obama Day' today, and I wish you the same. At the very least, you must concede that he is a reasonable, intelligent man who brings good will, which is refreshing in itself in American political leadership at the highest levels (I refuse to contaminate the manuscript of my soul with unworthy names, but we all know who I refer to here). And as I've said to many of my friends today, if our idiotic Canadian Prime Minister insists on kissing the Americans' ass, well, at least it's worth kissing now.
Speaking of kissing, I miss it. I also miss a capella and choir concerts, the Kirkland House JCR and courtyard, walking past Widener and Au Bon Pain in the morning, and concoting new culinary experiences out of ready-made dining hall food to the admiration and envy of my beloved blockmates. I was reminded of this last yesterday night in particular.
We had a potluck dinner meeting for Physicianship Apprenticeship that though fabulous, went a little later than I would have liked (from 6:30-11:30. yeah. for reals.). However, the company and conversation was great. And oh, the food! Copious amounts of baguette, Brie, Camembert, goat cheese and Swiss. Plentiful Italian red wine (no worries -water, jasmine and pear green teas were my choice of beverages). Bruschetta with pesto. Mixed greens with baby tomatoes, kalamata olives, bocconcini (tiny mozzarella balls) and balsamic vinaigrette. Green string beans cooked with tomato, garlic, sauteed onions and parmesan. Pasta primavera -fusilli with tomato, onion, zucchini, garlic and mozzarella. And to round out our Italian-themed night... butter chicken! Yup, one of my favourite South Asian dishes (speaking of which, after a 4-month-long craving, I finally managed to get some quality jelabi, which is an Indian fried sweet that is bright orange from sugar, lemon juice and saffron -really yummy). The butter chicken though -random, but impressively tasty. And for dessert: strawberries, pineapple and apple with dark chocolate fondue, and mango-peach sorbet swirled with vanilla ice cream. I know. No wonder it took five hours!
This week is very meeting-heavy on the whole though. But also fun plans with friends. Also, I did quite well on my respirology midterm (shukar), so the med school life is moving along. During Physicanship today we discussed homosexuality, heterosexism, homophobia and gender, in society more broadly, and in the context of the doctor-patient relationship. Very interesting, especially at the end when two patients talked to us about their experiences and answered questions. One was a 40-something married lesbian woman with three young children (sperm from anonymous donors), and the other was a 60-year-old gay man, from a Catholic-to-the-bone Quebecois family, who has been a teacher for forty years.
Anyway, time to catch up on that renal [I said this in the original entry yesterday, and it remains true today]. As they say on Grey's, seriously.
Just before I relay that entry, I wanted to tell you that today, as a volunteer with Project Genesis (which I have discussed in previous entries), I accompanied the woman I work with to interview a nurse who works for Medecins du Monde for a mini-documentary she's doing on healthcare rights, etc. This nurse, through MM, which also has psychologists, a couple of volunteer doctors and probably some social workers, actually goes on the streets of Montreal with a small suitcase on wheels and a backpack, to deliver basic care (vaccines, UTI medicine, etc) out of a little 'clinic' to communities that have been marginalized by the healthcare system -mainly people who live on the street / street workers, prostitutes, and Natives/First Nations people. Really, it was amazing to hear about her story and heartening that there are actually so many people like her and so many organizations like this one in Montreal, that don't even exist in other parts of Canada. This is why I am proud to be a Montrealer.
Anyway, this was what I had to say yesterday (my thoughts on Obama's glorious win, and on delicious food).
Caramel apple cider is delicious. I don't think many people know about it or realize how wonderful it is, but really... apple pie in a cup. Life is good today, the world is sweet. Yes, I'm going on four hours of sleep, renal is kicking my ass so far and I don't feel like studying, but it's a beautiful, warm, sunny day in November. And last night Obama made history -first elected African-American President of the United States of America. The media at least keeps framing it this race-way. But it is really so much more than that, like charcoal-grey, thick, cottony clouds blowing away, out of the way, and beneath, the glow of a vibrant world with hope renewed all around. He is a man with a vision of peace, justice, alliances and prosperity for his people; he has spirit and his charisma is infused in every poetic world uttered, words that will move more than hearts, and, inshallah, will summon more than tears from the people's eyes -joy, hope and real, profound change. Not overnight of course, and not without many a grueling challenge, but slow, gradual positive transformation. It is amazing.
I have been wishing everyone 'Happy Obama Day' today, and I wish you the same. At the very least, you must concede that he is a reasonable, intelligent man who brings good will, which is refreshing in itself in American political leadership at the highest levels (I refuse to contaminate the manuscript of my soul with unworthy names, but we all know who I refer to here). And as I've said to many of my friends today, if our idiotic Canadian Prime Minister insists on kissing the Americans' ass, well, at least it's worth kissing now.
Speaking of kissing, I miss it. I also miss a capella and choir concerts, the Kirkland House JCR and courtyard, walking past Widener and Au Bon Pain in the morning, and concoting new culinary experiences out of ready-made dining hall food to the admiration and envy of my beloved blockmates. I was reminded of this last yesterday night in particular.
We had a potluck dinner meeting for Physicianship Apprenticeship that though fabulous, went a little later than I would have liked (from 6:30-11:30. yeah. for reals.). However, the company and conversation was great. And oh, the food! Copious amounts of baguette, Brie, Camembert, goat cheese and Swiss. Plentiful Italian red wine (no worries -water, jasmine and pear green teas were my choice of beverages). Bruschetta with pesto. Mixed greens with baby tomatoes, kalamata olives, bocconcini (tiny mozzarella balls) and balsamic vinaigrette. Green string beans cooked with tomato, garlic, sauteed onions and parmesan. Pasta primavera -fusilli with tomato, onion, zucchini, garlic and mozzarella. And to round out our Italian-themed night... butter chicken! Yup, one of my favourite South Asian dishes (speaking of which, after a 4-month-long craving, I finally managed to get some quality jelabi, which is an Indian fried sweet that is bright orange from sugar, lemon juice and saffron -really yummy). The butter chicken though -random, but impressively tasty. And for dessert: strawberries, pineapple and apple with dark chocolate fondue, and mango-peach sorbet swirled with vanilla ice cream. I know. No wonder it took five hours!
This week is very meeting-heavy on the whole though. But also fun plans with friends. Also, I did quite well on my respirology midterm (shukar), so the med school life is moving along. During Physicanship today we discussed homosexuality, heterosexism, homophobia and gender, in society more broadly, and in the context of the doctor-patient relationship. Very interesting, especially at the end when two patients talked to us about their experiences and answered questions. One was a 40-something married lesbian woman with three young children (sperm from anonymous donors), and the other was a 60-year-old gay man, from a Catholic-to-the-bone Quebecois family, who has been a teacher for forty years.
Anyway, time to catch up on that renal [I said this in the original entry yesterday, and it remains true today]. As they say on Grey's, seriously.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Taking a Breath: Real Patients, Real Medicine and Real Life
Yes, we have progressed from cardio to respiratory. Puns are not as lowly as you might think. They can even be witty. My gchat status has lately been alternating between "turbulent flow", "physiological dead space", "just dead space" and my latest one: "everybody needs a little TLC -that is "Total Lung Capacity"". I know. I am such a nerd (but you love me for it).
Anyway, this is a long post, so for your convenience, I have subtitles throughout so you can read only what you're interested in (and I'll save you the agonizing anticipation -there is no hot romance discussed below ;).
Cool stuff in the books.
So I'm learning about lungs, hemoglobin and partial pressures of CO2 and O2 lately. I won't bore you with any doc-talk (or med-student talk), but I will just briefly mention that respir actually does have a "really cool thing" analagous to the cardio "really cool thing" which was "Venous Return" (if you recollect). Basically, just like how the blood returning to the heart from the veins is one of the biggest determinants of blood circulation (rather than pure cardiac output), similarly, it is not low oxygen but high carbondioxide that decides whether or not someone is hyper- or hypo-ventilating (and other important things relating to breathing). It's always the counter-intuitive stuff that's coolest if you ask me. That is, counter-intuitive, but still understandable (unlike some of my lectures of late).
Brief meeting with 'Real Medicine'.
I recently had the following thought though: "Okay friends, med school was a fun adventure and I'm ready to go home now..." Except there is no home. This is home. And it is strange that the fact that this is my life and a lot more to come from now on, has only hit me now. Don't get me wrong, I am learning a lot, getting excited, getting bored, then excited again. I am still mainly starry-eyed about medicine -hopeful, momentarily discouraged, and then hopeful again. I pulled out my back, limped around for a week, and then healing and walking normally again, but during the limping around phase, I shadowed my former CEGEP orgo lab partner (who is now a Med-4) during his neurology clerkship. It was pretty awesome to visit patients with him, see a doc (well not technically I guess) actually do the reflex tests they always show them doing in kindergarten picture books, apply hand sanitizer 8 times in 20 minutes, do a little investigative work on uptodate.com, watch a "team" analyze CT scans of a stroke patient in radiology, and most excitingly: watching a real-live LP ("lumbar puncture" = spinal tap, the purpose of which was to test cerebrospinal fluid for encephalitis or menengitis) for the first time!
Keeping it 'Real': Life Pseudo-Outside the Med Bubble (okay, not really, but outside the book-worming bubble!)
This past weekend, I found out that I got the volunteer position I wanted with an organization in Montreal that advocates for public health care and immigrant rights, particularly fighting against a Quebec bi-law that denies healthcare coverage for newly-landed immigrants for the first 3 months. The organization -Project Genesis -also works with the local immigrant community providing various social services, advice (like helping find loop-holes in the law), etc. So I am looking forward to making my med school life actually mean something in the real world where the people live.
The noteworthy, traditionally heavily Med-1-attended Osler Banquet is coming up next week, and I have been involved in some small ways (like postering -Steiny and Chi, I finally know what your crazy postering lives were like -and some ticket distro next week right before). The guest lecturer is Richard Horton, editor-in-chief of the Lancet, who will be talking about doctors and their social responsibilities in a global health context. Should be pretty awesome. My Resp midterm is 2 days later.
Today I registered for MedGames, which is this:
Med students from across the country get together and compete in real sports like hockey, swimming and volleyball, as well as 'parasports' like DDR, Rock Band and Capture the Flag, and then 'bond' during various night-time social events. It is for a weekend in January, and every year is hosted by a different med school. Luckily for moi, the 2009 MedGames are being hosted by Universite de Montreal (UdeM), so it is just here at home, nice and cheap and convenient.
'Real Patient': First Official Clinical Encounter
I had my first official clinical encounter yesterday at the Royal Victoria Hospital, in our Osler Fellow's Hematology Department, a woman in her 40s with leukemia (sudden and acute -not the most optimistic prognosis) who was just about to have her first bone marrow stem cells transplant... what really struck me was a couple of things: firstly, she was super athletic and active and now suddenly has been bed-ridden in a hospital for 4 months. BUT it was so touching to see the amazing support system she has. 3 WHOLE WALLS COVERED in well-wishing, get well cards, family and friends by her side all the time (love was palpable in that room!). Also, the patient told such a wonderful story about how her brothers and sisters were all hoping that they could all be a match to donate their stem cells to her, literally "fighting over" who could give their dear sister their stem cells... and not only was 1 match found, but 2! Imagine finding 2 potential donors amongst sibilings of a stem cell recipient, when to find just 1 is a blessing. However, just as love was palpable in that room, so was the overwhelming sense of mortality, of feeling that life had been snatched away so quickly... imagine having to write your will when you're in your forties. That encounter will stay with me always I think. She is a beautiful person, and all medical reasoning aside, I will keep her in my prayers, my thoughts and my heart. I want her to be well. Too bad my wanting it that way alone cannot just make it be that way.
Anyway, this is a long post, so for your convenience, I have subtitles throughout so you can read only what you're interested in (and I'll save you the agonizing anticipation -there is no hot romance discussed below ;).
Cool stuff in the books.
So I'm learning about lungs, hemoglobin and partial pressures of CO2 and O2 lately. I won't bore you with any doc-talk (or med-student talk), but I will just briefly mention that respir actually does have a "really cool thing" analagous to the cardio "really cool thing" which was "Venous Return" (if you recollect). Basically, just like how the blood returning to the heart from the veins is one of the biggest determinants of blood circulation (rather than pure cardiac output), similarly, it is not low oxygen but high carbondioxide that decides whether or not someone is hyper- or hypo-ventilating (and other important things relating to breathing). It's always the counter-intuitive stuff that's coolest if you ask me. That is, counter-intuitive, but still understandable (unlike some of my lectures of late).
Brief meeting with 'Real Medicine'.
I recently had the following thought though: "Okay friends, med school was a fun adventure and I'm ready to go home now..." Except there is no home. This is home. And it is strange that the fact that this is my life and a lot more to come from now on, has only hit me now. Don't get me wrong, I am learning a lot, getting excited, getting bored, then excited again. I am still mainly starry-eyed about medicine -hopeful, momentarily discouraged, and then hopeful again. I pulled out my back, limped around for a week, and then healing and walking normally again, but during the limping around phase, I shadowed my former CEGEP orgo lab partner (who is now a Med-4) during his neurology clerkship. It was pretty awesome to visit patients with him, see a doc (well not technically I guess) actually do the reflex tests they always show them doing in kindergarten picture books, apply hand sanitizer 8 times in 20 minutes, do a little investigative work on uptodate.com, watch a "team" analyze CT scans of a stroke patient in radiology, and most excitingly: watching a real-live LP ("lumbar puncture" = spinal tap, the purpose of which was to test cerebrospinal fluid for encephalitis or menengitis) for the first time!
Keeping it 'Real': Life Pseudo-Outside the Med Bubble (okay, not really, but outside the book-worming bubble!)
This past weekend, I found out that I got the volunteer position I wanted with an organization in Montreal that advocates for public health care and immigrant rights, particularly fighting against a Quebec bi-law that denies healthcare coverage for newly-landed immigrants for the first 3 months. The organization -Project Genesis -also works with the local immigrant community providing various social services, advice (like helping find loop-holes in the law), etc. So I am looking forward to making my med school life actually mean something in the real world where the people live.
The noteworthy, traditionally heavily Med-1-attended Osler Banquet is coming up next week, and I have been involved in some small ways (like postering -Steiny and Chi, I finally know what your crazy postering lives were like -and some ticket distro next week right before). The guest lecturer is Richard Horton, editor-in-chief of the Lancet, who will be talking about doctors and their social responsibilities in a global health context. Should be pretty awesome. My Resp midterm is 2 days later.
Today I registered for MedGames, which is this:
Med students from across the country get together and compete in real sports like hockey, swimming and volleyball, as well as 'parasports' like DDR, Rock Band and Capture the Flag, and then 'bond' during various night-time social events. It is for a weekend in January, and every year is hosted by a different med school. Luckily for moi, the 2009 MedGames are being hosted by Universite de Montreal (UdeM), so it is just here at home, nice and cheap and convenient.
'Real Patient': First Official Clinical Encounter
I had my first official clinical encounter yesterday at the Royal Victoria Hospital, in our Osler Fellow's Hematology Department, a woman in her 40s with leukemia (sudden and acute -not the most optimistic prognosis) who was just about to have her first bone marrow stem cells transplant... what really struck me was a couple of things: firstly, she was super athletic and active and now suddenly has been bed-ridden in a hospital for 4 months. BUT it was so touching to see the amazing support system she has. 3 WHOLE WALLS COVERED in well-wishing, get well cards, family and friends by her side all the time (love was palpable in that room!). Also, the patient told such a wonderful story about how her brothers and sisters were all hoping that they could all be a match to donate their stem cells to her, literally "fighting over" who could give their dear sister their stem cells... and not only was 1 match found, but 2! Imagine finding 2 potential donors amongst sibilings of a stem cell recipient, when to find just 1 is a blessing. However, just as love was palpable in that room, so was the overwhelming sense of mortality, of feeling that life had been snatched away so quickly... imagine having to write your will when you're in your forties. That encounter will stay with me always I think. She is a beautiful person, and all medical reasoning aside, I will keep her in my prayers, my thoughts and my heart. I want her to be well. Too bad my wanting it that way alone cannot just make it be that way.
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